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The complication from the son’s side is, not wanting to let go of his mother.
Some men reach adulthood but they are not yet finished with their mothers.
The two most common triangles are: son-mother-father and wife-son-mother.
When the narcissistic mother has dug her claws into her dependent son you can pretty much bet there are underlying marital problems in the mother’s marriage to her husband.
What they don’t realize is, they have a right to a life of their own.
Parenting is supposed to be a time-limited function and we are not suppose to nurture our own parents.
The message to you, his wife (or lover, if you want to drop the married part) is, you can marry my son but I stay number one in his emotional life. The problem is, your husband has not yet left his mother. If you don’t leave your mother you don’t have the emotional space to be truly married.This triangle indicates that there are two women vying for one man. Conflicts increase over time and allegiances are strained.Of course this kind of emotional arrangement can get pretty complicated when her son’s wife is trying to get her mother-in-law’s ‘love.’ A lot of people are psychologically immature when they get married and try to compensate for what they didn’t get in childhood (love) now from their spouse’s family. Problem is, it’s bound to be disappointing when your mother-in-law is narcissistic.What often happens is the narcissistic mother and her husband get to ‘avoid’ dealing with their marital problems by getting over-involved in other activities and people. For her husband it might be over-work, another woman, or simply emotional withdrawal.When the triangle consists of son-wife-mother, the narcissistic mother’s control in her son’s marriage is bound to create marital problems for him and his wife.